DS OTC 034: Setting Boundaries That Serve You

DAYnamics Show Off The Cuff #034: Setting Boundaries That Serve You
Have you ever caught yourself at the bottom of your own priority list? My personal voyage through the tangled web of self-neglect to self-care has taught me the transformative impact of setting boundaries and honoring my own needs as well. It's okay to take time to take care of yourself as well. It starts with as little as a 1 minute break.

Tune in, and let's foster a community where we prioritize ourselves and weave a rich tapestry of lessons learned and wisdom gained.

References in the Podcast:
Are Your Priorities Aligned With Your True Self  Blog
The Ultimate Top 10 Fell-Good List Podcast

Transcript

Copy Transcript Copied

Prioritizing Self-Care and Setting Boundaries

Speaker 1 0:15

Hello everyone . I'm Marianna , creator of the Day Dynamic show and your guide to remind you to line with your own dynamic well-being every day . Today we are focusing on our unscripted and unpredictable off-the-cuff recording on the subject of priorities , but not just setting priorities , but actually getting clarity on what is a priority in your life and for what reason . So with this show , it will help plant the seed so you become more aware around this topic and realize there's no when size fits all path . Choose what serves you and feels right for you around this subject . Now , if you have ever listened to one of our off-the-cuff , it is unscripted and unpredictable . Sometimes I scribble down some notes and sometimes I just something's in my head and I need to address it and in this case , there has been several situations lately where it has showed me that I was not a priority to others . Now , that's not a poor me statement . That is not a statement about all . Of course you're not . That's common sense . But for me , when I put others as a priority and we'll clarify sort of what priority means when you put others as a priority , then sometimes I think and maybe I need to feel this a little bit out more is that I want to be treated like I treat them . I'm expecting them to act like I act towards them , and we're talking about what we would consider friends or strong acquaintances or family members or someone that is in your life a lot that you care about . Now what this has ultimately shown me because I know how the law of attraction works I get it . I've attracted this to myself for a reason , and that reason could be to help me , it could be to help others or it could be to help a situation , but because I'm involved , then I know that I co-created this on some level . And if you take that approach on most things in your life , then you'll understand your life a lot better . When , like , something happens or something unfolds and you're like , oh , I co-created this , okay , if you can take the perspective of that , or even be open to that perspective , then it really will help have you have a different perspective on life and it may change up a lot of things for you and then you feel so much more empowered .

Speaker 1 4:04

But back to this priority stuff . What it really ultimately showed me was that I was not making myself a priority , that I was making others a priority , because I just tend to want to serve and take care of others and be that teacher that I am and that thoughtful , great friend that I am . So someone's looking for a great friend here I am and that will expect the same back from those people that I do call friends . Now , there's acquaintances and there's friends , and there's situational people that you hang out in like certain areas or certain times as well . When you are a true friend to me , then I will be one of the most supportive and loving people and be your cheerleader . Hopefully that you have friends like that in your life , that you make a priority .

Speaker 1 5:22

Can you relate to anything like this ? Have you had these situations where it's like , hey , I'm not feeling I'm getting back what I'm giving out and not that you expect by giving that you get . You should give because you want to give , but when life is showing you and situations are showing you around you that you're not a priority to others , or your situation or experience or part of your journey is just you're just not that priority because people show you . So if you're willing to pay attention and you can make all the excuses in the world for others which you tend to do when you do love or care for them . It just really is showing you , hey , they're showing me , they're playing apart for me , they're telling me which whether we have this agreement or not , before we even came to this journey that we call life here is that every once in a while they're going to help remind us that you're not putting yourself first , you're not putting yourself as a priority , you're not taking care of you , you're not having that self-care , you're putting others more important than yourself , and that your own connection with your own inner being and your own guidance is getting put to the sideline because you're actually not making that a priority in your life .

Speaker 1 6:56

Again to our listeners , can you relate ? And I would say , if people are aware of what's happening in their life , I'm sure that at some level that they absolutely have had time where the priorities just maybe are not in full alignment . And I'm a side note to that , because I can feel sometimes when I do these podcasts , I can almost hear what others are going to say and although I can be clear with what serves me , you need to be clear with what serves you . So it's not a selfish thing to make yourself a priority . And we've said this in many of our resources , through the dynamics series through the kid dynamics and obviously through this dynamic show , is it's okay to make yourself a priority Permission given right now . If you're looking for it , there it is . We're here again to remind you about this .

Speaker 1 8:17

But let's get a little bit deeper , because I had a conversation with my husband it was actually last night and we were sitting outside and I just said , you know , I'm just recognizing now that this thing and that thing and this thing and that thing and this situation and this person and this . And I just said to him it's like I don't know if I should do like a podcast and be like super emotional about this and you know , and really do it from a poor me thing . But I can't go there because I know better . And then I thought , can I do it from a emotional , angry thing ? And I'm like , okay , well , how does that serve , other than I'm getting my anger out or my disappointment or my out of alignment emotions out , like how does that really serve in the moment ? I mean , I guess it does serve in the moment because you want to feel better . So getting things out obviously helps .

Speaker 1 9:28

And then I said to him I just need you to sit and just listen because I just need to get it all out , and I sometimes , when I verbally get it out , it's great . And then I do some journaling or writing down or blog or whatever it might be , to get my true time with myself , get it out and get it out of paper . And then so once we started talking a little bit , I said I think I'm doing a blog on this tomorrow . I think that it can help lots of people and help me just get it out , because a lot of times when I'm doing this off the cuff , I'm just because it's unscripted , it's just whatever message . I always do an intention before I do these podcasts and I just go okay , what do I need to share for alignment and healing and balance and what can help other people relate to this and do take home tools later towards the end of the podcast which can really help . So he goes like , yeah , I think you should . Then and I said , good , and if I have emotions during it , so be it . He says yeah , so be it , just be you . And it was a great thing , because what it also had me remember is an idea that I had for another podcast , which is what is your listening language ? You know we have love language , we have support language . We have I don't know how many other languages we have out there of how we relate , how we listen , like using all our senses , and I think I'm going to do one on listening language . I know sounds good . If you see one in our either blogs and or podcasts , then , yeah , by all means listen to it . I think it would be great .

Making Yourself a Priority

Speaker 1 11:37

So , speaking of blogs , we wrote a blog on are your priorities aligned with your true self ? Now , sometimes you just have to take a moment , reflect about that is your priorities aligned with your true self ? But it's not even about that on this podcast , this is just a blog with a different take on it , because it does help you set your priorities a little bit . This is more about are you reminding yourself to align with your own dynamic well being by taking care of yourself and making yourself a priority , and then maybe even balancing that expectation around . What are you expecting from others ? Because , no disrespect , you will get disappointed Because other people are doing their own thing . So , again , it's always about balancing your own alignment with you around any subject , and priorities are one of those subjects . Now , if you have been with us for a while .

Speaker 1 12:54

Then you know that we always usually do a definition if you don't know what a certain word means , and that's just to help along the way with a starting point of what the online dictionary will say , and then you can decide how you actually want it to be . That tends to be what people have accepted as a definition for a word , and you know that's up to you what you want it to be . So the definition of priority from the online dictionary says the fact or condition of being regarded or treated as more important , or a thing that is regarded as more important than another . Now , I don't want to think that anyone is more important , although I do know that they are . As a person , we're all like a unique , authentic individual , and I think that's . I think that's a beautiful thing . I guess what it is is what's more important for me , what I want to make a priority . So when I'm making others a priority , my expectation is they will at some point show me that I'm important to them , and when it doesn't , that's why I do things like this , a podcast .

Speaker 1 14:19

Then I thought about like , what are some of the things that are a priority to me in my life ? Not in any particular order . The first one should be myself , my self care , physical , mental , emotional , spiritual , my overall well-being . I would say , right up there is a family , like spouses , kids , you know , direct family , blood family and whoever else you consider your heart of your family , you know . And then there's things like the health and the relationships and the home and the education and the work and the enjoyment and , again , whatever is important to you and like .

Speaker 1 15:11

Priorities change all the time . What might be a priority for me today is not a priority for me tomorrow or even in this moment . It might not be a priority for me the next moment . But I just want to get back into that , how I felt with these different situations , and I think that would be helpful . These different situations happened . It showed me that I was not a priority and that's okay because people have their own priority . It's okay now because I've thought about it and balanced it and reminded myself that , hey , listen , thank you , thank you , thank you to those people that didn't make me a priority . So I again I'm showing myself that I need to make myself a priority . I really do . And are you making yourself a priority along the way Now being a priority , if you look at the definition , is just making something more important and you're with yourself all the times .

Speaker 1 16:24

You need to make yourself that priority , because people that want to be in service can't give if they have nothing to give . If they're not filled up themselves , then they're just only giving you half of what they are , quarter or 10% or whatever it might be . Sometimes people don't understand how to do that self-care and that priority for themselves . That saying of people always show you who they are . So pay attention For those people that are important . Just like have that conversation . This is what I want , this is what I expect . This is what a friendship means to me . This is what an acquaintance is .

Speaker 1 17:18

Some people do not have the capacity to do that and that is okay , but you need to find out where they fit in your own life . And then it's funny sometimes when I've made people priorities and then I back off a little bit to do priorities for me , then all of a sudden they're coming to me . So it's quite a Quite , a lot of attraction thing if you just look at your life . If you can take any subject in your life and look at , a lot of attraction is working in it . Priorities is usually part of that as well .

Speaker 1 18:05

So let's go to our take home tools . Here in my world are many ways to set priorities for , like either my day or my week or my year or you know whatever in priority . Sometimes it's not a goal , it's just what is important to me right now . I had to sit down and after last night and actually woke up early this morning with the dogs and I just said I'm going to make a list of my priorities and what's important to me right now , like write that down . And then another take home tool might be , instead of writing it physically with your own hand , like just make that an online version of the list and then you can put it in calendars for reminders . And if you have to put like things on your mirror , if you have a smartphone , put it on your backdrop just to look at it , set yourself reminders that pop up and then you know , just to remind you something about whatever one of your lists are on , your priorities , or maybe just something that pops up in your phone to go , hey , you are the most unique , authentic person and making yourself a priority right in this moment , no matter what you're doing .

Speaker 1 19:47

Take that breath , say something knowing , affirmative or mantra , or something that really grounds you and balances you and makes yourself that priority . You know I'm not talking about . I mean making yourself a priority can be as fast as 30 seconds to a minute , because you're taking , you're saying at this moment I am more important than what is going on right now in my life . You don't have to sit for hours and hours and hours although if you have that time , that's great but when it comes up , when something comes up , just ask yourself what is my priority here ?

Speaker 1 20:31

Is someone asked you to do something ?

Speaker 1 20:33

Is this a priority for me ? Someone wants you to go somewhere ? Is this a priority when someone's you know , hey , whether it's hey mom or hey this or hey dad or hey Mariana , or a text or an email or whatever , make yourself the priority over it . Don't just run or answer it , or answer the phone or do whatever if right at that moment , it's not a priority for you , because if that is so important , they will text back , they'll call back or do whatever and go . Hey , I just you know I really need your help . Or you'll listen to the voicemail they leave you , or you'll read the email or read the text or whatever it might be , whatever situation you're in as far as how you communicate back and forth , and I think this , sometimes a word , no can be a very self-care , priority word .

Speaker 1 21:41

You know it's all going to be unique to each individual . You need to soothe yourself , nourish your soul , and we've had so many resources , so many blogs , so many podcasts , vehicle videos , one-minute reminders of how to do that . But you know what that is Like . I just looked at my top 10 list again , my top 10 feel-good list , and right at that moment that was a priority for me is just to read that and feel that , feel those 10 things on my list , and just take that time to align and to balance . And again , you are the best at knowing what works for you .

Prioritizing Dynamic Well-Being and Resources

Speaker 1 22:29

So are you ready now to align with your own dynamic well-being when it comes to priorities Every day , or at least be on the path to it ? I mean , we always appreciate when you subscribe or share , as always if it serves you , if you feel there's value in what we are talking about on this podcast . So , as we close up , we just want to say hey , we have lots of great shows coming up and lots of past recordings that have been great and go see what serves you , or go to dynamicshowinfo and explore our great resources . Need to add that all materials are copyrighted and are for international . Yeah , it's because this show , I was reminded , is international , is for informational purposes . So until we meet again , thank you , thank you . Thank you for listening and making yourself a priority , and we always love when people send in how they do that , because we're all co-creating with each other . We're all helping each other out , so make it a dynamic day . Bye for now .